By Rich Harshaw

Presents are supposed to be fun, for crying out loud. That's why I live by a pair of semi-iron-clad gift giving rules.  

My wife found out about the first rule, "no predictable gifts," the hard way shortly after we were married. A few days before her birthday she was getting something out of my car when she accidentally stumbled on a bag from Kohl's containing a burgundy sweater she had been wanting. The next morning I noticed the bag had been oh-so-slightly disturbed and promptly returned the sweater and got her a random kitchen appliance instead. She was surprised (and not in a good way) when the sweater remained on her wish list for another year.  

She shouldn't have been too surprised. After all, I'm the same guy that proposed to her while watching TV; I complained that something was stuck in my shoe and reached down into my sock and pulled out an engagement ring and said "Oh, it must be this rock in my shoe that's causing me problems. Here. Why don't you take it instead?" I'm not sure why she said yes either.  

Which brings us to rule number two: NO GIFT CARDS. Back in the day, you had to actually think up a gift, go to the appropriate store and get it, wrap it, and then give it to the person. Now all you have to do is go inside the convenience store while pumping your gas and choose whichever gift card you want off the rack next to the cigarettes. Nothing says "I refuse to put any effort or energy into our relationship" quite like the gift card.

A couple years ago I was wandering the aisles of Target looking for a last minute gift for my mother's birthday. My mom's probably about like your mom. She really doesn't need a single thing in life, and Target certainly isn't the place to find that perfect, interesting gift. I was on the verge of breaking down and violating rule #2 when it appeared in the home décor department -- a 10-inch tall red ceramic Buddha head. I checked the price and found it was on clearance for $22 -- just $3 less than the boring gift card I would have otherwise caved in and given her (yes, I'm cheap). I bought the Buddha head and stuffed it in a box with the gift receipt and a card that said "this is actually a gift card worth $22 -- take it back to Target and exchange it for whatever you want."

When I gave the box to my mom, she opened it, held up the Buddha head, and said, "what on Earth is this!?" We all got a good laugh out of it until a few months later when I stopped by her house and noticed the red Buddha head prominently displayed on a shelf in the living room. She said she actually kind of liked the head and decided to keep it. Besides, she said, she liked the memory of the funny gift more than she liked $22 worth of cat food, deodorant, and laundry detergent from Target.

Here's a common problem: People just aren't that creative and fun, so they end up giving predictable, boring gifts every year for birthdays and Christmas. And they hate it. Nobody WANTS to be that boring gift giver. We just succumb to it because we can't think of anything better. What if you could find a way to make giving your product or service fun and interesting? People would be more willing to buy stuff from you as gifts since you would not only allow them to check "getting the gift" off their to-do list, you would also allow them to check off "having some fun."

Let's turn back to my poor wife for another example: Two years ago for Christmas I wanted to buy her Lasik eye surgery. Not exactly easy to wrap up and put under the tree. The Lasik center did have gift certificates, and I got one. Boring.

So I went to the dollar store and bought a bunch of pairs of those magnification reading glasses and crushed them up and put the pieces into an eight-inch tall decorative jar with a screw-on lid. Total cost was about $7. It made a great present because nobody knows what a bunch of crushed up eye glasses in a jar sounds like. When my wife finally opened the present she saw a bunch of mangled frames and broken glass. She got the trademark "what the!?!" look on her face... until she saw the note, "You won't be needing your glasses anymore." Pretty cool, I know.

So let's extend these ideas into something you could do for your business: How could you package your "gift card" with something tangible to make it a fun gift for your customers to give this holiday season? This is an especially great idea if your product is not tangible (like Lasik) and the gift receivers, therefore, wouldn't necessarily expect to receive a hard-good or tangible "gift" under the tree.

There are several ways to do this. The easiest being to either package the gift card with some kind of related toy (hey, it's Christmas... even an adult could use a new toy!) or with something old and worn out. Here are a ton of examples to get your brain going, in near alphabetic order:

• Accountant: Granted, it's not on most people's wish list. But why not give the gift of an accountant's time for tax preparation -- or whatever? To make this fun, you'll have to package your certificate with something unique and accounting related. How about a huge stack of fake money (accompanying note: look how much you'll save!) or some kind of nerdy looking doll (just Google "nerd doll" images and you'll find plenty. I kind of like Brainy Smurf myself).

• Auto Repair: This is easy. Put some old, broken auto parts in a box and you're golden! No further explanation necessary!
  

• Beauty Supply: If you run a beauty supply store, don't let your customers walk out with just a lousy gift certificate for a gift. Help them make the gift fun by giving them one of those "Bratz" dolls and a note that says, "Make yourself look glamorous."
  

• Cars/Boats: Lexus sure makes it look like fun in those commercials to put a big red bow on a car and then have the surprised spouse look out the window. Trust me, this is a horrible idea. You should never (I repeat, NEVER) pick out another person's car. Let them pick it out -- they know exactly what they want. But you can get them a "gift certificate" for a car that's a scale model of said vehicle. Wrap that sucker up, pop it under the tree, and watch your spouse brim with delight.
  

• Carpet Cleaners: Get some carpet and cut it up into pieces and stuff them in a box. Then throw your certificate in there with a note that says, "A little help to make your carpet look like new again."
  

• Cell Phones: This has always been a tricky thing to buy people because there are contracts involved, and the phones are so personal. So if you sell cell phones, why not gather up a million of those old cell phones that everyone has that are basically JUNK and give each gift card buyer about 10 or 12 of them. Put them in a box that is heavy and sounds interesting when you shake it. Then put a note in there that says "bring these junkers into the store (along with this certificate) to exchange for the phone of your choice." This is extra brilliant because you could keep using the same junker phones over and over!
  

• Clothing Store: Grab a Ken or Barbie doll and dress it up real nice. Put a note in there along with the gift card that says, "Look fabulous like Ken." Or a similar alternative. Get a bunch of Barbie/Ken/random doll clothes and wrap them up in the gift. Tiny clothes and a gift card are way more fun than just a gift card.
  

• Computers: Read cell phones and accountants above for some ideas. You'll start to see that this is pretty easy to do for lots of industries.
  

• Credit Repair: Hey, it's a practical gift, right? And it could be packaged with a hammer or some other tool. Repair stuff? Get it?!?
  

• Dentists: A teeth whitening certificate could be packaged with a plush tooth doll (they exist, believe it or not) or those annoying chattering teeth. Or a pair of sunglasses (you'll need these when you look at your teeth!).
  

• Movie Theaters: Finally, something to do with all those old, bad VHS tapes! Every gift card comes with a box with 10 or 12 VHS tapes with the (now you're catching on) note that says, "How about a new movie, for a change?!" or some such.
  

• Dry Cleaners: Finally, something to do with all those old wire hangers! Put a pile of 100 of them in a box with the (here it comes again) note: "This is just the beginning -- by the time you use this gift card you'll have dozens more!"
  

• Tutoring: You'd have to be a lousy parent to get your kid tutoring for Christmas. But if you are a tutoring company, why not get a bunch of huge squishy brains to put in the present under the tree. People will buy this. You just watch and see.
  

• Financial Planners: Not a good time right now for financial planners. But if you are one, have your clients give the gift. Why not an old-fashioned-looking money sack -- the kind that old timey bank robbers used to come out of the bank holding. The sacks are empty except a (here it comes again) note that says, "Time to fill your money bag back up," or something similar.
  

• Hearing Aid Sales: Old, crushed up hearing aids.
  

• Hotels: This is easy: Get your hands on about a million of those little Monopoly hotels and put a couple hundred of them in a glass jar with your logo on it. You figure out the note.
  

• Jewelry: If you're too chicken to actually buy the jewelry (I've learned that lesson the hard way, thanks Jared, The Galleria of Jewelry), then go with the fake stuff in the present along with the gift card. It can be real fake jewelry or kid's fake jewelry. A fun touch is to put the fake stuff in the real box. Makes your wife tilt her head sideways like the dog when you tricked throwing the ball.
  

• Plastic Surgeon: Use your imagination. Heh. That's what I thought of, too.
  

• Pet Store: See how this is getting easier. Not as easy as the plastic surgeon, but still pretty easy. Hint: there's a line of children's toys called "The Littlest Pet Shop." 
  

• Piano Store: Either a toy piano (easy) or a bunch of old piano keys in a jar (admittedly harder). Notice the jar theme here. Good stuff!
  

• Restaurants: The classic gift card gift -- boring, but appreciated. What about getting some kid's pretend food that could be wrapped up as a present. Or what about a huge box of Goldfish or pretzels with the gift card taped to it with a note that says, "To keep you from getting hungry."
  

• Vacations/Travel: Whatever the obvious souvenir is for the destination, that's what goes in the box.

Okay, so do you get the point by now? Hopefully I've inspired you as a business owner to find ways to package what you sell as a gift that's fun, interesting, and unique. And if not, maybe your spouse or kids can at least have a little more fun this year as they open an assortment of bizarre gifts from you. Remember, we now have Ebay at our disposal, so there's no limit to your wackiness.

Just don't come looking for me if your spouse won't talk to you for weeks after discovering something bizarre in a glass jar. Receiving these kinds of gifts can take some getting used to!

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